To Lie (aka Good Versus Bad – Does It Even Exist?)

[Verb; ~Pronunciation: /too/ /lahy/]

  • Definition: Wondering if not telling the exact truth to someone, even with their best interest at heart, is right or wrong. In the end, it’s still telling a lie and that’s a bad thing. So when is lying justified, if ever? Where does it begin and where does lying stop?
“Honesty is more than not lying. It is truth telling, truth speaking, truth living, and truth loving”
– James. E. Faust –

When is lying bad and when is it good, if ever? I always felt like telling a lie was a bad thing, that it would cause you bad karma and you’d always be caught out in an ugly way.

But what about if you’re planning a surprise birthday party for someone? You’d need to lie in order to keep everything a surprise, wouldn’t you? Is lying a bad thing in this case or is it justified?

I’m not exactly sure what caused me to ponder on this, but fact is my head’s been occupied by this topic for a couple of days. Not because I tell a lot of lies, on the contrary: I try to tell as little as possible. But because I convinced myself I should tell the truth always since liars are bad people.

Is it okay to give a friend your honest opinion about her new boyfriend or is it not? What if she directly asks you for it, do you stay truthful or do you tell a lie so she won’t be offended?

What if you go out shopping and your mother puts on the most horrendous pullover ever, which she absolutely adores. Do you come clean and tell her she ought to buy something different or do you compliment her anyway, despite hating the outfit? (I’ve been in this situation, actually. I told my mother if she didn’t put the thing back, I would – and then I did. It’s okay: she still loves me).

And what if you know something but keep it a secret? Is that lying or does that fall under “privacy”? I’m sure we all know to keep our PIN numbers a secret, don’t we? But that’s private and nobody else’s business. If it were, we’d print them on our T-shirts and show the world.

Or you know, something like that.

Secrets, lies, openness, it’s all so confusing. If you want to be an honest person, and the Universe knows I do, then where do you start?

The answer to any difficult question is often very simple: start with yourself. Because lies and truths might be confusing, even painful or hurtful at times, the only truth you need to savour is this one: if you’re not honest with yourself, you cannot ever be honest with anyone else. And maybe lying might not be so bad depending on the situation, lying to yourself cannot ever be right.

So don’t fool yourself into thinking you’re someone else; whether your lie makes you feel better or worse about your reflection in the mirror won’t change the actual you.

Choose the person you want to be, the things you want to do, the road you want to take, and go from there. But whatever you do, be honest and open to yourself. If anyone deserves that from you, it’s you.

And if you ever do have to lie in a bold way, make sure you do it right:

What about you? What do you think about lying to others: when is that okay and when is it not? What was the last time you lied?

8 thoughts on “To Lie (aka Good Versus Bad – Does It Even Exist?)”

  1. I think you are absolutely right about this. I think lying is a really bad thing but in some situations it is better to not directly tell the truth and the thoughts you have in your mind. I love the way you write, its really inspiring!! Im going to read more of your blog, Im really interesting of what Im going to find next hahaha

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Oh yes I do like it, a lot!! I read about your problems and you are not yourself lately, I have the same problems as you and I love the fact that you are able to write openly about it!! hope you are doing better now and Im happy to read a lot more of whats coming from you πŸ™‚

        Liked by 1 person

        1. I am doing better, thank you so much! I hope you will feel better, soon. What helps me is to write/talk about it and make new plans. Try and stay positive πŸ™‚

          Liked by 1 person

  2. I suspect many of us like to ourselves far more than we lie to others. As for answering the questions of our friends, I suspect more often than not our friends seek validation far more than they seek truthfulness. Besides, they already know the answer, for instance the question, “Is this item wrinkled?” Of course it is: otherwise, they would not have asked. I’ve been advised that the best way to answer, is simply to ask a question. In my example, the question might be, “Why do you asked?” or something along those lines.

    Liked by 1 person

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