“Nothing ever remains as it was, nothing exists to stay the same” – Random Paper Wisdom
Dear Life,
Sometimes I feel like giving up. Quit everything and accept I have failed at you.
The moments I feel like this are the moments in which I stumble upon someone else’s success.
Like two weeks ago. I had just spent the day with my eldest sister feeding rescued donkeys at a Scottish sanctuary. Even if one of them bit my sister (seriously, who does that ever happen to!?) and another sneezed all over her, we had a great time.
Afterwards, I was on our Air BnB’s sofa, all warm and cozy, waiting for my sister to finish up in the bathroom. To kill time I was gazing at Facebook updates when something caught my eye.
An old classmate had changed her last name. I clicked on her photo and immediately wished I hadn’t: she just got married.
Somehow someone I used to know taking such a big step confronted me with how little progress I feel I’ve made in you, Life. A familiar panicky feeling of standing still while the rest of the World moves on grabbed me by the throat and wouldn’t let go until the next morning.
Find a job and partner, buy a house and start a family. Even if these are not the steps I envision for my own future, Life, being confronted with others who do scares me.
What if this is what I should be aiming for?
I shouldn’t. That’s not me at all and you know that path would make me miserable beyond imagination.
You have different plans for me, Life, and even if sometimes I feel like quitting, you always know how to make me change my mind and be grateful I am here instead.
Nothing lasts forever. Feelings of happiness and moments of anxiety will always come in waves. And that’s what makes you, Life, worthwhile.
Heart to Follow 
Success is something relative, personal, unique. You write your definition of success.
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You make me smile. I literally wrote my definition of success down somewhere as a reminder of what I want to achieve. We all should, it feels a lot better than just following the crowd! 👍
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I am glad I could brighten your day.
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Just be you Samantha, you are fine as you are. Besides, someone may be looking at your Facebook page with envy. 🙂
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Thanks, Bill 🙂
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I understand your mixed feelings. So much of the world around us tells us that we should succeed in the same way other people are succeeding. Remaining true to yourself is a far better way to accomplish the journey that is right for you, to succeed in your own way rather than other peoples’ ways. J.
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Thanks, J. This means a lot. I know you’re right, it’s just… sometimes there’s that awkward feeling of doubt, you know.
Then again, we can’t be anyone but ourselves and there’s no other path to follow than our own. So I’ll probably end up alright 🙂
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I’m confident you will end up alright. J.
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