Goals

GOAL POST (1) – Don’t You Just Love A Good Pun

  • Currently working on: Goal 1 – Feel Better

Goal post… Get it? I thought it was funny. Funniest thing that happened this week anyway.

Seems like every day something stressful happened and I am not sure this worked well on my goal to feel better. On the other hand: it did put some things in perspective.

  • Sunday – My stamina escaped to lordknowswhere (I reckon it’s taking a break from all the hard work it’s been put through this month), leaving me exhausted. Spent most of the day asleep on the sofa and watching TV, hoping Monday would be better…
  • Monday – Just as the F, the L and the U made their entrance into my train of thoughts (“Now THAT would make sense!”) I got home to find my father sick. Sick as in “his-friends-from-his-wood-chopping-class-called-the-paramedics-because-they-thought-he-had-a-heart-attack” sick. He didn’t have a heart attack, don’t worry. His organ of balance got, well, out of balance.
    I am 33 years old. In all those years, I have never seen my father ill! NEVER! So at this point, my stress levels picked up pace while ascending to their peak.
  • Tuesday -Nothing too exciting happened. My dad did a little better and I remained exhausted.

“Be brave enough to heal yourself, even when it hurts”Bianca Sparacino

  • Wednesday – When visiting an old client of mine I was negatively impressed by her state of health. Pneumonia, a severely bruised hip and loss of speech… All things she had been checked for (and is constantly being checked for), but it got to me.
    That evening, weeks after my last one, I got another one of my infamous attacks. Just as I started thinking I’d passed that stage, it came back… But it was different, somehow. No stomach lock-down and it didn’t last as long as its predecessors did. I am starting to think maybe the stress is a bigger incentive for these attacks than I care to admit.
  • Thursday – My pet gerbil Waldo has an inner ear infection for which he is being treated. But because I cant explain this to him, he keeps scratching his right ear in an attempt to make the itching and hurting stop on his own. All this scratching made him look like he escaped a gerbil horror movie, as right now it looks like half his face is gone! I found him, all bloodied up, in his cage and my stress meters immediately went berserk! I’ve now taped his hind leg so he can’t scratch (he still tries it!) and have added painkillers, cleaning sessions and honey creme to his list of medicine. How I am going to fix this, I am not sure… Worry Fest 2020 was now in full swing.
  • Friday – Today I learned my blood pressure is low. Which is kind of funny, because with all the stress you’d think it was so high you could climb it to pluck a few stars from the sky. But no, it’s low. It explains the exhaustion and the headaches and maybe even the attack, so for a strange reason I am happy about this.

I have set upon doing breathing exercises (at least) twice a day to help let go. I drink more in general, and licorice tea (yuck) in particular, and eat more salted snacks to up my blood pressure. When I feel worried, I visualise a beautiful colour or happy thought into the worries, to make them more bearable. I keep feeding my father tea and check up on Waldo every chance I get, knowing that even if he doesn’t like what I do to him, it will help him more than if I’d do nothing.

And I’ve stopped telling myself I don’t do enough to feel better.

Because I do ❤

How have you all been doing on your goals? Let me know in the comments! 🙂

Letters to Life

Letters to Life (57)

“I realise I hold my own destiny in my hands, like a sculptor with a rock that he’s going to chisel into shape”Random Paper Wisdom

Dear Life,

The magic of Saturday made me wish for more days like that, yet at the same time found me grateful for their scarcity. Because that makes them much the most special.

My family is busy and chaotic but every year we manage to find a spot in everyone’s agendas for a family get-together, usually at a theme park.

With my nephew and nieces around, I tend to forget I am not good with children or how awkward I am around them; every silly thing I do is warmly welcomed by the whole lot.

So much so, that I even got away with child abduction, Life! Albeit for just a little while… 😉

We had finished our lunch and were lazily making our way over to the next ride. I thought having my two nieces with me – one by each hand – would slow me down (especially because there was a fair amount of skipping involved) and I figured the rest would catch up with us in no time.

However, while twirling around  for what felt like forever in what I considered was a rather aggressive giant tea cup, panic started to rise: where were the others? Were they really going to leave me alone with two children?

But then the youngest of them giggled her contagious I-am-having-SO-much-fun laugh while the other got comfortable by putting up her legs on the seat and resting her head on my chest, and I couldn’t help but smile at this stolen moment, Life.

And the best part: yesterday was filled with such moments! With all three of them.

With one more on the way (my middle sister is due in December – nope, don’t expect me to reproduce) I am already looking forward to our family outing next year. And the next. And the next. And the… And…