Heart to Post

About Missing Pieces And Fulfilment

“The art of simplicity is a puzzle of complexity”Douglas Horton

You know you have changed as a person when you’ve passed a life test with flying colours. A test that, years ago, you’d never have succeeded in finishing, for the simple fact that there was (literally) a piece missing.

Are you ready for a little paradox?

Over the Christmas holidays, me and my mother took it upon us to finish a puzzle of 1,000 pieces. Don’t ask me why, because neither one of us is into jigsaws, yet we thought this would be a fun challenge.

We started on Christmas Eve and a few weeks later (we didn’t work on it every day), this was the end result:

It feels like I spent hours looking for that missing piece, but I failed to find it. It could be anywhere or nowhere at all (maybe it wasn’t even in the box to begin with, who knows?). In reality, though, I’d given up my search in about ten minutes.

The absence of this one meagre puzzle piece would have felt like a thorn in my old self’s eye and I wouldn’t have been able to step over it for days, weeks maybe. Perhaps I’d never have been able to really accept the frustrating fact that one lousy piece was missing – a failure, even if 999 pieces are in place, the annoyance of that one piece missing would instantaneously destroy any feelings of success.

The new me sighed it off after a mere few minutes and carried on with her life. There’s more important things to worry about, I thought.

That’s your paradox right there: that one piece missing from the jigsaw is also a lost piece I’ve found in my personality. I’ve grown.

That silly we’ll-never-do-that-again* puzzle might be unfinishable, I am working on my own personal completion, one piece at a time.

How have your holidays been? Any pieces you’ve added to your own puzzle?




*My mum’s birthday is coming up and as a surprise gift I’ve ordered a custom made jigsaw, another astonishing 1,000 pieces, of her grandchildren. I’m afraid we’ll actually do it all again, but I hope this time we won’t be missing any bits

PS: I am slowly coming back to life and I’ve put “WP” in my journal. That’s code for “I hope to make time this week to read up on all if your blogs” (finally)!


HAPPY NEW YEAR – January Is The Best Time To Get Your Priorities Straight

Happy 2020, everyone! I hope you had a wonderful 2019 and are ready to take on the new year with excitement, renewed energy and enthusiasm!

As for me: I have been doing a little better physically, but I am far from where I want to be. Still, an improvement is an improvement, no matter how small, and I take every teeny tiny flicker of victory as exactly that: a victory 🙂

As 2019 was rounding up, something magical happened: my youngest niece J. was born! As many of you probably know, we lost her sister I. in 2017. The impact of this loss caught up to me in a thousandfold as I held the newest member of our family in my arms for the first time. J. will probably never know how grateful I am for her presence, her heartbeat, her perfect existence in this less than perfect World ❤

I can honestly say I have never enjoyed holding babies much (something with them being so fragile and their head needing support), but this baby I’ve already held more times than I did the others combined. I keep finding myself in strategic positions so that her parents will pass her on to my arms, which they always do, heheh.

Something else happened: my *attacks* have lessened. That is to say, I still get sick and it still happens on a weekly basis. But it’s no longer always on a Wednesday and the force of the attacks has decreased. Seems like my homeopathic diet is working 🙂 I’ve also picked up working out, albeit on a very low level of intensity. I’ve had my first run since four months a little while ago and even did half a Body Pump workout a week ago. I am still exhausted after every exercise, but at least doing something is better than nothing.

And then there was the final realisation of 2019 that turned my whole world upside-down: I’ve been investing so much energy into this one particular someone, it’s literally been keeping me up at night.

When all went wrong again and my worries peaked again and I saw that person again and they pretended their life was A-okay again, it finally hit me: that person will never learn to take responsibility for their own actions, problems and happiness if I keep rushing to the rescue. I am wasting my energy on them. Energy that I very much need myself.

So I stopped worrying. I stopped wasting this much of myself on them, and decided it was time to choose for myself. To invest all that extra energy I now have into myself! 😀

And that realisation is the driving force behind my new goals:

I figured the dating is optional, but if I feel good and my business is making a profit, why not consider finding a partner? Who knows, in the worst case I’ll end up alone, like I am now, but I’ll surely feel fine about it because I’ll already have reached goals 1 and 2.

And just because making my business as a life coach a success is number two on the list, doesn’t mean I’ll not spend time on it now. My list of goals are actually my current priorities. Feeling healthy and content should always be everyone’s top priority.

It’s never been mine, though. I was always busy taking care of others…

In that light, me feeling terrible is a good thing. Because it showed me right where my flaws were: never was I really focused on me.

My goals (or priorities) have given me a renewed drive to work on myself and something to write about. For a while I was struggling where to take this blog to. I tried several things that weren’t really me. But now I’ve found something to occupy myself with that I can use as a topic for my writings as well.

I say that’s a happy start of 2020!

It’s just a bit sad I have to drive back to the restaurant at the other side of the country tomorrow, because that’s where I lost my credit card today… Well, at least they’ve found it and kept it secure, and the journey gives me (plenty of) time to rehearse Mika’s new songs before his concert in February.

How have you all been doing? Any resolutions or goals for 2020? Let me know! 🙂


Happy New Year!

I hope each and every one of you had a wonderful New Year’s Eve and similar start of 2019. As for the rest of this new year, I wish you all an extraordinary 365 days, lots of positivity, and all the happiness you can carry in your heart.

Let’s make 2019 amazingly memorable! 🙂


Happy Holidays!

It’s Christmas 2018! And although I am worse than The Grinch around this “special time of the year”, I do want to take this opportunity to wish everyone:

Make today, and all other days, count, shake some stress off, take time to be with your loved ones and to cherish your best moments here on this planet.

Happy Holidays to you all! 😀


Heart to Post

About Endings Everywhere – Heart One (of One)

“The battle of getting better is never ending”Antonio Brown

As Autumn, and this year, are rolling to an end I couldn’t get myself to write another two-tiered post. Mainly because I don’t wish to either end or start out of harmony (did you honestly think I was capable of writing 50% of a story now and 50% next year?), but the excuse I will serve you today is that I don’t want to get you confused, not with the holidays coming up so soon.

You have better and more important things on your minds than my consisting-of-two-parts-posts I so long for you all to comment on.

Instead, I’ll write this one-piece-post about endings: the ending of Fall. The ending of 2018. And the ending of my innocence as a driver.

As a child, I never once questioned the seasons. My mind, however, saw the days grow shorter and so figured Winter started somewhere at the start of December. Say the first day of this month.

The thing is, I love Autumn’s colours and the weather getting colder and the smells when I go for a walk. But after the final leaf has fallen, my complete mindset jumps into Winter Mode. My idea of Fall is not one with empty branches, apparently.

And now Fall is really at its end. Winter is lurking at my doors and windows, eager to get in to, with quite a volatile relentlessness, freeze off my feet. Like it tries to every year.

Not being a real Winter fan, I can’t wait for the 21st, after which the days will slowly grow longer. I already yearn for Spring, wishing for the end of Winter even before it has begun.

Then there is this year coming to an end soon – in less than two weeks we’ll wish each other a “Happy New Year!”.

2018 was one heck of a ride, but, luckily, not near as terrible as 2015 or 2017 were. No casualties so far (except for that one car – but we’ll get to that). Instead, my self-confidence took a huge leap and I ended up with my own small business and my very first customer! An amazing trip to Finland saw one of my dreams come true and physically I couldn’t feel better. My old blog was successfully transformed into Heart to Follow and luckily I didn’t lose any of my readers or friends!

A big thank you to you all, for sticking by me, following me on my new adventures and inviting me to your personal space on the blogosphere in return! You all enriched my life, one by one, one way or the other. Thank you so much for that!

Then finally… As the daylight started to hide and I made my way over to my sister’s, I crashed into another car!

Nah, not really.

Apparently, even if I damage another car I do it delicately; as I tried to manoeuvre out of the way of three other cars coming towards me in a very tight street, I turned the corner too near to a parked car and scraped its front, causing light damage.

I left a note and found the other party kind and forgiving. We came to an agreement and things turned out fine for both of us in the end.

So all’s well that ends well. Or maybe all’s well that starts well.

Since this is the last main post I’ll be writing this year, I wish you all Happy Holidays and a marvellous 2019! May your conscious be light, your spirits bright and your heart happy and warm.

On to a great ending and a fantastic new beginning!




End of this Full Heart